Before I get to the pee and poo, I wanted to let you know that I have a guest post over at Life in these Times today since Sara had her baby a week ago. It’s more on toddlers hitting (at first I wrote hitting toddlers and that was a little too Wonder Showzen) and setting boundaries for your household, instead of from perceived expectations. Be sure and leave me a comment over there so I know you checked it out! And since that post is about parenting, I thought I’d supplement it by doing one along the same vein here today, too.
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EB is almost 21 months old and is potty training like a champ. How the heck did I do that, you ask? Simple.
Have Granny get her to sit on the potty.
JK. A little. We tried potty training a while back because EB was squatting when she peed or pood. I figured she was showing interest, so why not get a potty and see if I can make my life easier? We have a Baby Bjorn Potty Chair because it looked the most comfortable, the most like an actual potty, and it doesn’t slip or scoot when EB sits down. But this was after getting a couple of terrible versions that I had to return – because EB couldn’t even use them.
Not an intuitive potty. What the heck.
For instance, here is EB standing in the pee hole. Not going to work. Every time she sat on this thing, it scooted around. It was the cheapest one I could find, because I figured, what’s the diff? Well, it’s a big diff if your kid won’t pee in it because it’s impossible to use.
So I did research and saw a lot of great reviews for the Baby Bjorn. And I like that it’s white because if you get a colored potty, it seems harder to make the correlation between their training potty and the real one. At least, to me. I wanted a mini version of the real thing. And I think it works.
I didn't even ask her to sit down - she did this all on her own. Good job, EB!
After both peeing and pooing in the potty the first go-round, I realized it was only because I was keeping her on the thing while reading stories or playing with blocks, and she would accidentally go from being on the seat so long. That’s fine and all, but she had no real desire to go by herself. And she would see my shocked reaction to her just going on the floor and trying to get her on the potty in time, so she started hiding when she had to go. I found a lot of surprises behind the door in her room. I realized she wasn’t ready, and I didn’t want to cause any irreparable harm by forcing it. But at least she had used it for the intended purposes, which I figured would be a step in the right direction when we were training later.
I think it’s been about 6 months since we tried training last. I hadn’t even considered trying to potty train over Christmas, but both of my parents kept suggesting to EB to use the potty. I started putting her on the toilet before baths, just to plant the idea in her head, but she never went. It was too big, even with me holding her. She couldn’t relax. My mom stayed with me a few days after Christmas and we double teamed watching her and suggesting to pee in the potty. She just sat right down and peed! Like it was nothing! And she gets up and yells that she pee peed in the potty. YELLS. So we don’t miss it. Then I grab the tray before she has a chance to grab it (this has happened once) and tell her “say bye bye to the pee pee” and she does. Sometimes she watches me pour it in the toilet; other times, she’s not concerned.
We have had a few floor-pees, but more often than not, she uses her potty. I have her pants-less on days at home so there’s no worrying about pulling anything down if the urge strikes her. And school, I send both undies and pull-ups. She has had a few accidents at school, but it’s pretty normie. She has used the potty more times than the accidents, so I figure we’re on the right track.
Here are my biggest POTTY TRAINING TIPS.
Do-do’s:
- Encourage your child to say the words “pee pee” “poo poo” and “potty.” Then they can tell you if they went or need to go.
- Keep their tush uncovered while training at home. We’ll worry about pulling pants and undies down later.
- Have the potty in the room where your child is playing, instead of in the bathroom.
- Give your child books or toys while sitting on the potty, to encourage them to sit a while.
- Ask if they need to go a lot. They will say they don’t, and then pee right on the floor. So just keep asking.
- Say how pleased you are about your child using the potty, and give stickers or tell everyone how well she’s using it – in front of her. She’ll feel proud that you’re showing her off (right now it’s not embarrassing, but it will be in a few years).
- Watch out for your child squatting, or needing a little privacy when squatting. This is when I move her to the potty, no matter if she’s just taking a knee. And it’s also where we placed her potty – beside the couch, so she can hide a little.
- Keep paper towels and a mop handy. Your child won’t always make it.
Don’t-Don’ts:
- Don’t react if your child doesn’t make it to the potty in time. Repeat “We pee in the potty.” Never ever get upset with her for an accident. She will start hiding and feeling shame for a natural function that she hasn’t quite mastered.
- Don’t keep training if she is not showing interest. Take a break, try again later.
- Don’t force your child to sit if she doesn’t want to. Guide, but don’t pressure.
- Don’t put the potty in a separate room, because it will be too far to go. She won’t make it in time. And won’t be thinking about it.
- Don’t start with an insert in the toilet. Get a small training potty instead. It’s too out of scale, too hard to get on, and not conveniently placed, as already discussed.
- Don’t feel trapped at home while potty training. It’s great to start this when you have time at home to really focus, but don’t feel like you can’t leave. Putting her in a pull-up and running errands won’t mess up the progress you’ve made. Just pick it up when you get back home.
- And finally, don’t feel frustrated if the kiddo relapses a little. It’s really common to feel like you’ve got this thing mastered, only for her to start having accidents again. Just rinse and repeat.
Let me know your potty training tips in the comments!
We started with the potty insert. After working with hundreds of toddlers, I have found that for some the transition from the little potty to big potty is difficult, so we just started with the big potty and a stool. She still needs some help getting on and off, but tells me about half the time when she needs to poo poo. She also announces anytime anyone walks into the bathroom very loudly “poo poo!” just in case there was any confusion about what goes on in there. She hasn’t figured out the pee, but were not actually potty training yet. Were in the “planting the seed” phase.
We will probably end up with a little potty when we start for real training so that she can be more independent with it and not need us to help her climb up. We do the before bath and bed thing too. Good tip to start early, and throwing the poop from diapers into the toilet.
Good luck and keep me posted on how it goes!
My little man will be 2 in a couple of weeks (eek! still can’t believe it), hoping this is the year of toulet training! He’s had a slight interest in the potty & toilet since he was about 14 months old but he’s still not quite ready. He insists on sitting on the toilet or potty before he has a bath which is a step in the right direction. He’s been very excited after the few ‘lucky’wees & poos we have managed to catch in the potty or toilet. Thanks for the tips, hopefully he’ll graduate from nappies to jocks with ease!
Happy early bday to him! And hi-five to the giving-birth-day for you! As long as he’s happy sitting there, even if he’s not actually going, he’ll be just fine. And I love “nappies to jocks!” I’ve heard “nappies” but I haven’t heard “jocks” yet. Cute!
hehe, it’s hard to know what different words people use for things around the world. I think we’re starting off well and we’ll go full steam ahead when he’s showing more understanding and interest.
Great tips Jelly!! You did/are doing a lot of the stuff we do at school and have the parents do when we’re potty training kiddos. We always start with “happy sitting” like you did where we have them sit on the potty and do fun stuff like read books, play with cool toys, sing songs, etc. Then we move to a schedule- maybe every 30 min we go sit on the potty.
The biggest thing that makes potty training successful is a reward system. The rewards will work best if it is something they can’t play with (or eat) all the time. Stickers work great or you can get a box and put some cool toys in it that are only for potty time- not cars or crayons that you have a million of b/c then why do they need to go potty to get them? they have 25 more in their toy box. That way when they do go potty and get to play with that toy for 5-10 minutes, it’s special and really exciting. Also if there are a few different choices of things to play with, they don’t get bored with their reward. If toys aren’t doing it for your kid, try food. It doesn’t have to be sugar-filled (although sweets tend to be VERY effective) it just has to be something you don’t give them unless they go potty. It could be goldfish. whatever they like.
Once you get them going frequently, then you can work on them staying dry. We do a “dry check” half-way between potty times. So if they are going every 30 min, then every 15, we have them feel that their pants are dry, make a big deal about it, and they get another reward. Could be the same thing as they get for going on the potty, or it could be something else- as long as you only give it to them when they stay dry.
You are absolutely right about not getting upset when your kid has an accident. I have seen so many kids that are ashamed of even having to go and just hide in a corner rather than tell someone. It’s really important to let them know that accidents happen and we can try again next time.
I’m glad EB is doing so well with potty training!! I’m sure it will help your finances a lot when you don’t have to buy diapers anymore!!! If you hit any speed bumps on the potty training road, give me a call. I’m a good potty training problem solver
GREAT suggestions, Katie! I especially love calling it “happy sitting” and the idea of a “dry check.” Thank so much for putting down what you know here in the comments! For reals. I love having good ideas in once place. And I will be sure and let you know if (when) we hit the inevitable speed bump. xoxo
Great advice! EB is doing a super job on the potty. Our big key to potty training success was the iPad and TV. Both were incentives to stay on the potty longer, especially for pooping. Also, for the transition to the big potty, we got a footstool plus toilet seat insert so she could do all steps herself.
For us, potty training was a set of milestones, rather than just a single destination – peeing in little potty, peeing on big potty, wearing underwear out of the house, pooping on big potty. Our final milestone was achieved this summer/fall when our daughter started to stay dry all night.
Yes, that’s so true about the TV. There’s a good chance Yo Gabba Gabba is on TV right in front of EB in that picture. It totally helps. We have to use the iPad to get Gabba on the TV, so EB knows it does that instead of fun kid-related things. Right now…
And I love the way you say that – you’re right, it’s not all about getting right to the end. Congrats on the dry night! I am going to think of the milestones as this goes along.
I thought about skipping this one since my husband and I are the only people in our household likely to have an accident, but I’m glad I didn’t – very entertaining. All I remember about potty training is that the third child was potty trained by age four (and he turned out okay although our neighbor Erland gave us a really hard time during third child’s senior year about kid’s partying in our garage and peeing in his yard).
Ha! I’m glad he turned out fine. As long as he didn’t pee his pants while he was a senior, right?
Right now my 2 year old is a potty-using champ IF she is naked from the waist down. Tomorrow we are starting underwear, complete with prizes she chose at the store yesterday… paperdolls, nail polish, and board-books. I am keeping my fingers crossed!
Pants-free is the only way! Good luck with the undies! Or “jocks” as Mummasays calls them. That is such a big step! Fingers firmly crossed on this side of the intertron, too.
Hehe! ‘Jocks’ is catching on!! Jocks for boys and for girls I call undies ‘knickers’
knickers!!
That top potty pic may be the funniest thing I have ever seen!! And I’m so proud of EeBz!! You’re welcome to bring her potty btw, so she doesn’t miss potential training days, and doesn’t have to suffer the discomfort of sitting on our weird airplane potty. <3
I KNOW!! IT was ridiculous. I couldn’t keep the pee tray in there because she wanted to put her legs in the hole so badly. I def need to bring the potty, I gotta make a list for packing tonight!
Great advice, we’re in the final stages of potty training ourselves (I’m trying to hold off on the outside-of-the-house training: what if there’s no toilet around? What if I cant get all the winter layers off in time?)
Totally agree on the naked butt advice. And the other thing that’s been working great is to lead by example: Charlotte loves to watch me use the toilet. A bit creepy I know, but it usually gets her to go too, and as a bonus it keeps her in the bathroom with me so I dont have to worry about toddler wreaking the house when I go!
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